Monday, June 15, 2009

Joke of the day -- Gary Pruitt and the three envelopes

Via email, here's a joke that applies to Gary Pruitt -- or any other CEO caught up in circumstances beyond the ability to control:

A young aspiring CEO was hired by a large company to replace the out going CEO. As he was moving into his new digs the guy he was replacing happened by to pick up a few things he forgot.

He told the new CEO, “In the top drawer of your desk are three letters I wrote for the new CEO. They are numbered 1,2 and 3. Don’t open them now. You will know when to open them.”

The first 6 months running the company went well -- but then things started to take a turn. After another couple months the new CEO knew it was time to open the first letter. It said: “Blame the previous guy.” He followed these words of wisdom and things went well again. The stock went up and sales were good.

Again things began to take a turn for the worse and after holding out as long as he thought he could the new CEO opened the second letter. It said : “Hold a press conference and tell them you are reorganizing to make the company lean and aggressive.”

After the press conference things went well. The stock shot up again. Sales were strong and things were looking good.

But alas it couldn’t last.

As the company went further and further down hill, the CEO opened the last letter.

It said: “Prepare three new envelopes.”

I think it's time for Gary Pruitt to prepare three envelopes.


Anonymous said...

Remember the N&O’s joke?

The headline of the mock front page states:
"We'll get off at this next port, please."
Below, the subhead continues the thought:
"But Do Enjoy The Rest Of The Voyage---
Mind The Icebergs."

Anonymous said...

Is it true that Sac Bee is trying to sell the employee parking garage to a developer who plans to build condos? And that they have already sold the building and lot across the street from the main building? Sounds as though they are cashing out.

Anonymous said...

The 'Suc' Bee has everything for sale. Nothing is out of the question, so I heard.

JayFredrickson said...

Gary Pruitt has zero, I repeat, zero economic value to McClatchy. I do not undeerstand why the McClatchy family continues to have confidence in him. Totally runied the family company with overleveraged expansion plans at the wrong time. How, and why, does this guy stay around?

Anonymous said...

Don't feel bad Sac Bee......most everything at the FWST is for sale too with plans to move and lease but with the layoffs and buyouts.......soon they will need to only lease an oversized closet with bathroom rights......
Outsourcing ad design tasks to India still sucks and now otsourcing Accounting functions is live and also sucks.

Nothing matters though as no one is buying and no one is listening.....famous last words "Make it Work and do your multiple jobs Cheerfully."

Anonymous said...

"Make it Work and do your multiple jobs Cheerfully."

"Be happy in your work"

"Arbeit macht frei"