Wednesday, December 16, 2009

Miami Herald publishes tips on how to cheat on your spouse without getting caught

Guess the Miami Herald has stopped all pretense of being a family newspaper. Via Random Pixels comes word the Miami Herald published an unsigned column in its entertainment section entitled "Adultery 101," listing five ways to keep from getting caught cheating on your spouse.

A commenter on the site has the best take:
I know the herald is hemorrhaging money but, this goes beyond the test of what is in good taste. This article confirms my decision to stop purchasing this paper. In addition, it's interesting how the reporter(s) of this article chose to remain anonymous -I don't blame them, I would have too!



Anonymous said...

Does that mean the Miami ENQUIRER will stop running cover for Democrats (John Edwards?) Or are they merely piggy backing on Tiger/Cheetah?

Report: John Edwards bought Charlotte home for former mistress Rielle Hunter (Charlotte Business Journal)

Rumors have been circulating for several days through Charlotte’s Eastover neighborhood that former U.S. Sen. John Edwards bought a home here for his admitted former mistress, Rielle Hunter.

And now the National Enquirer is reporting in its Dec. 21 issue that Edwards has, in fact, bought a house here that the Charlotte Business Journal has identified as a residence on Providence Road.

Edwards, the vice presidential nominee on the 2004 Democratic ticket and a presidential candidate last year, saw his political career derail after details of the affair emerged.

In late 2007, the Enquirer first reported claims from an anonymous source that Edwards had an affair with a campaign worker, later revealed to be Hunter, a filmmaker hired to produce YouTube videos for Edwards’ 2008 presidential campaign.

Hunter gave birth to a daughter in February 2008. At the time, Edwards campaign aide Andrew Young said he was the father. Young later retracted that claim.

According to the latest Enquirer article, Edwards backed out of an arrangement to lease the Charlotte home to Hunter after she asked him for nearly $18,000 per month in child support. Hunter and her child were to have moved into the house on Dec. 1, the article states. Late last week, the home appeared vacant.

Anonymous said...

The end point for the daily newspaper is progressively more radical and alternative tabloid supported by ads for tattoo parlors and escort services read by a small group of disaffected urban failures. This article is just ahead of its time.

Anonymous said...

Maybe the Herald is simply pulling out all the stops hoping to find a niche market?


With disgraced two-time Presidential Loser John Edwards under investigation by a federal grand jury for alleged misuse of campaign funds as part of a conspiracy to cover-up his affair with Rielle Hunter, a mystery trip to the home of a wealthy supporter - and possible witness - has legal experts wondering WHY?

Raleigh, North Carolina TV station WRAL on Friday showed video of Edwards at the Raleigh-Durham airport exiting a private jet belonging to Rachel "Bunny" Mellon, 99, a wealthy heiress who supported the ex- Senator's presidential campaign.

Flight records revealed the plane flew from Raleigh-Durham to a secluded airstrip at Mellon's northern Virginia home.

In 2008, Mellon's holding company donated $3.48 million to Alliance for a New America, a 527 group linked to Edwards' campaign.

Federal Prosecutors investigating Edwards have talked to Mellon's attorneys.

Both Edwards' mistress and mother of his love child, Rielle Hunter, and former loyalist Andrew Young, who had claimed to be the father of Hunter's child, have previously testified before the federal grand jury.

Former federal prosecutor Charlotte lawyer Ken Bell, said Edwards' flight may cause BIG legal problems for Edwards.

"It would create a danger of being accused of trying to influence a witness or obstruct justice," Bell said. "It's dangerous and perhaps inadvisable, but not necessarily illegal."

Andrew Young, in his new book Politician, an insider's tell-all of the Edwards conspiracy, alleges that Mellon partially paid Hunter's bills.

Due to the secretive nature of the grand jury investigation it's uncertain whether Mellon herself - a longtime Kennedy family pal -- has talked to prosecutors yet.

As The ENQUIRER previously reported in a worldwide exclusive a private trust fund with ties to Edwards bought a house for Hunter in Charlotte.

Child support negotiations between the two then broke down in a heated disagreement over Rielle's desire for $18,000 in support, which nixed Edwards' previous plan to admit paternity as The ENQUIRER revealed exclusively last week.

Anonymous said...

Anon 6:15 Bingo, We have a winner!

Anonymous said...

They could try cut and pasting articles directly from Castro’s official Cuban Newspaper?

(oh, they did, and may still me doing that. Never mind)

Anonymous said...

You don't need a spouse. The government is your wife/husband.

Anonymous said...

Very classy! What's next? How to kill your annoying neighbor and get away with it?

Anonymous said...

Looks Like McClacthy got some free publicity!

Miami Herald Staffers Give Tips on How to Commit Adultery (NewsBusters)

I'm not sure which is funnier about this Miami Herald story; that Adultery 101 was published in that newspaper or the fact that it was actually written by Herald staffers.

It is so bizarre of a story that it should be marked down as a sign of desperation to attract readers in the midst of a calamitous circulation plunge.

So let us now join the Miami Herald staffers as they present their readers with "helpful tips" on how to commit adultery with a celeb shoutout to Tiger Woods:

So you're left scratching your head, wondering how a guy like Tiger Woods would allow himself to get caught cheating on his wife.

We're not saying we condone Tiger's actions -- the best way to not get caught cheating on a spouse or significant other is to not cheat on your spouse or significant other.

But from observing celeb and non-celeb cheaters from the sidelines for years, following these basic rules would help one cover his tracks.

Anonymous said...

TIP NUMBER THREE ON HOW TO CHEAT ON YOUR WIFE (You should stick to how to take care of your employees when you go bankrupt!)

3. Get a ``booty phone.'' The best option, if you can afford it, is to use a second cellphone for calls you don't want your family or business to know about.

We realize that most people can't swing that option, but at least learn to use your cellphone carefully. Always delete text messages - both sent and received -as well as voice mails and call logs.

And when adding a phone number to your contacts, list it under a code name - like Driving Range or Clubhouse -- that won't look suspicious when your significant other looks at your phone.

Should we ask our phone service providers if they have a special discount on "booty phones?" Can we look up "booty phones" on eBay?

Anonymous said...

And we thought they only cheated on their ABC Audits...

Anonymous said...

This is beyond tasteless. Obviously, though, all this advice must be coming from Herald "Experts In The Field", right?